Just a note to say that DC Widow is taking the day off today. I decided to come up with a list of all of the reasons why I needed to take today off, and here is what I have:
Um, first, the election. Obviously. I felt as though I was going to have a panic attack a dozen times over the past two days and I could barely watch the returns come in last night. I never drink too much, but I needed that third gin and tonic. I stayed up way too late and let my kids do the same and now I’m so sleep deprived…..
….and speaking of sleep deprivation, I’m trying to be a teacher all day today and damn I teach American Government and all I need to do is remain sane and calm and explain what the Hell is going on without saying, “what the Hell is going on?!” And also the school administration wants me to do a special lunch session and of course I said yes because I’m the government teacher and I need to say yes but I need more coffee like right now…..
….on the subject of coffee can I please say that homeschool is breaking me in a way that coffee cannot repair? I’m so thankful that I have some grandparent help today but pretty soon I’ll be back managing three kids who don’t understand the earth’s rotation or basic subtraction and I just don’t know how I’m going to do that with no end in sight. Not that I think the kids should go back to school. I mean have you seen the Covid infection rate? I don’t even want to go to the grocery store….
….but I have to of course because I need food to feed my family and also I need to stop having chicken nuggets for at least one meal a day because Claire somehow thinks she’s going to get scurvy from a lack of vegetables and she may be right. And I need some more tonic water because it’s gone somehow….
….probably from last night. Or the night before, or the night before that…..or every night since the middle of March when we all were scared of every little tickle at the back of our throats. Also, can I just say that right now is such a time to be a writer (there’s so much to comment on!) but I’m just tired, tired, tired, like everyone else and especially like all of the other widows I know. It’s time for something to go right, isn’t it? And if it isn’t…..
….it’s at least time for a break. So I’m taking one. Or something like that.
Hang in there, friends and fellow widows. If there’s one thing we know, it’s this: things change. And on the bad days, the I’m-so-exhausted-I-can’t-take-a-shower days, there’s comfort in the knowledge that change happens. Sometimes it’s with a bang, and sometimes it’s very, very slowly.
And in the interim, it helps to take the breaks that you can.