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Must Read This Week: Jesmyn Ward
I cried the entire time as I read this article by Jesmyn Ward in Vanity Fair yesterday. It was sent to me by a number of widows and non-widows alike. The piece may speak to you in a multitude of different ways, as it’s about the death of Ward’s husband, racism, and the pandemic. It’s so beautifully done and I hope you’ll read it. (You’ll hear more from me on Friday!)
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Three Grief Specialists to Follow Right Now
Maybe you’re grieving the loss of a spouse right now or maybe you’re grieving something else. I don’t know why everyone comes to my blog, but today, I want to highlight three Black women whose work focuses on grief, loss and healing. Their candid discussions are relevant for everyone, and as you’ll note, two of these women are also widows. You can find the links to their various social media pages and websites below. Sabra Robinson is a fellow widow who runs the website and podcast Black Women Widows Empowered. While her group was created specifically for Black and Brown widowed women, her work is relevant to anyone who is…
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Trigger Warning
Last week, I wrote this piece for the Washington Post on how parents can help children who are grieving. In case you haven’t read it yet, I introduced the piece by talking about how Claire was really missing her dad last summer at the pool, and then I discussed what experts say parents should do in similar situations. I did not describe Shawn’s illness or death at all. I posted the article in an online group, thinking maybe others would want to read it. Also, I was genuinely proud of the work I did and wanted to share it. A few hours later, I saw that someone had replied to…
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In An Instant
Sometimes, who you are can change in an instant. “I do.” You’re a wife. “It’s a girl!” You’re a mother. “He’s gone.” You’re a widow. When these changes happen, the world often knows immediately. There’s not always a lot of training about how to be a wife or a mother or a widow before you actually become one, so the transition isn’t often smooth. I certainly argued with Shawn about sharing the household chores when we were first married, I definitely didn’t know how to install a car seat when Claire was born, and I absolutely had no idea how to carry on with my life when I became a…
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First Rental Car
I went to Minnesota in February this year. I know. It probably wasn’t the BEST time to visit that part of the country. But I had an assignment: I was going there to interview Nora McInerny. (As a note, this post is not about that interview – that’s not for my blog. This post is about my own experience of being in Minnesota. If you’d like to read what I wrote about Nora, click here.) A few months prior, I had pitched the idea to write about Nora’s new book. I spent about 20 minutes telling my editor how interesting Nora is, and all of the work she does for…
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More
Last week, I slept an average of four hours a night. I graded thirty freshman papers (and just trust me, freshman papers take three times longer to grade than senior papers.) I came up with a new idea for an article and pitched it to a major newspaper, and they picked it up and asked for a quick turnaround. I ran on my treadmill every morning and seemingly every time I came up with a new blog post that I jotted down as I ate my breakfast. I even applied for a promotion at the school where I teach. At one point, I woke up in the middle of the…
There’s No Handbook for How to Do This
