DC Widow

There’s No Handbook for How to Do This

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  • Inflatable Santa in the yard of DC widow Marjorie Brimley
    Holidays

    Decorating for Christmas

    December 17, 2018 /

    My front yard looks like something out of one of those bad Christmas movies.  I’m serious.  There are lights randomly strewn about, two fake deer, a dozen solar-powered candy canes and two massive inflatable figures – a snowman and a Santa.  I bought none of this stuff – it was all Shawn. Last year, he set it all up even though he was in the emergency room less than 24 hours later.  I know he worried that I wouldn’t be able to figure out the wiring system he used, and he had very specific ideas about how the lights should look.  When I think back on it, I remember him…

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    Marjorie

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    Youngest son of DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley lays on couch in living room

    When 5-Year-Olds Talk About Death

    September 23, 2019
    Image of concert like that of Fleetwood Mac concert attended by DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley

    Fleetwood Mac

    March 13, 2019
    DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley hugs her three children

    I Am Doing Today

    March 4, 2019
  • Shawn Brimley and his son Austin dressed up as Santa in the house of DC widow Marjorie Brimley
    Holidays

    Santa Shawn

    December 14, 2018 /

    I can’t actually remember why we decided to throw our first Christmas party, but I do remember this: Shawn was adamant that he was going to dress up like Santa for it.  He spent hours scouring the internet for the perfect outfit and he even bought new shoes and tiny fake eyeglasses.  He tried on the outfit before the party and decided that his dark eyebrows gave him away, so he went to the drugstore and bought a white makeup pencil which he used to color in his eyebrows. He took it all very seriously.  “You know the kids are TWO,” I told him, “so you don’t have to do all this. …

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    Marjorie

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    Blurred night cityscape for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley Hale

    Ask a Widow: When Sex Can Be Good…and When Sex Can Be Tricky

    July 14, 2022
    DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley looks at partner Chris

    Ask a Widow: Why is Sex So Complicated?

    February 17, 2021
    Desk with books for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley

    It’s Not Too Late to Say “I’m Sorry”

    March 22, 2021
  • Chalkboard image of classroom where DC widow is a teacher
    Family & Friends

    Lockdown

    December 12, 2018 /

    For many years, when we did lockdown drills at school, I always texted Shawn to tell him about it. Last week, I sat through my first drill without him.

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    Marjorie

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    Meat on table for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley

    Death by Pork Butt

    January 27, 2021
    Shawn Brimley hiking with kids outside DC

    Go, Go, Go

    July 6, 2018
    Children of DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley play in the sea with boats nearby

    The View in Portofino

    July 10, 2019
  • Shawn Brimley before surgery for colon cancer next to image of monster
    Missing Shawn

    Shawn’s Cancer Humor

    December 10, 2018 /

    Throughout his cancer diagnosis and treatment, Shawn maintained a sense of humor. It's one of the things I remember best about him.

    Read More
    Marjorie

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    Tacos for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley

    Now You Just Write Random Things

    January 4, 2021
    DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley Hale smiles at Grandpa Tom before wedding

    From the Archives: On the Phone with My Dad

    February 20, 2023
    Image of garage similar to that of DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley

    Soulmates and Other Things I Don’t Believe In

    June 7, 2019
  • Brimley children dressed as zombies on first Halloween after death of their father
    Missing Shawn

    Zombie Apocalypse

    December 7, 2018 /

    Shawn was obsessed with the idea of a zombie apocalypse and he planned all sorts of contingency scenarios. Why do I care now that he's not here to handle this?

    Read More
    Marjorie

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    Book for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley Hale

    From the Archives: My Mom’s Diary (Part 1 of 2)

    November 28, 2022
    Airplane in sky for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley

    The Anxiety is Real

    May 20, 2021
    Garden at house of DC widow Marjorie Brimley

    My Garden

    September 26, 2018
  • Marjorie Brimley DC widow stands in field in the fall
    New Perspectives

    Strong

    December 5, 2018 /

    “You are so strong.” The woman – the one who I barely know – looks at me with sorrow in her eyes. “You are amazing,” she says. “I think just about anyone else who had to face such loss would not do nearly as well as you have.” I thank her, and we part. I know she meant well, so I don’t think much of it. Also, I hear something like this at least a few times a week, so I’m used to it. I know everyone wants to be encouraging and maybe the people who tell me I am strong are actually impressed with my ability to keep it…

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    Marjorie

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    Husband of DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley lifts massive pumpkin

    Tell Me About Him

    June 19, 2020
    Shawn Brimley and family for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Hale

    Letter to Shawn (Part 2)

    February 23, 2023
    DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley looks at a card at a party with her husband Shawn

    Backsliding Into Grief

    March 11, 2019
123

About Me

I’m Marjorie Brimley, mother of three and high-school teacher in Washington, D.C., and this is the blog I never thought I’d have to write.

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Categories

  • Ask A Widow (30)
  • Dating (26)
  • Family & Friends (88)
  • From the Archives (28)
  • Holidays (69)
  • Love and Chris (25)
  • Missing Shawn (64)
  • New Perspectives (107)
  • Parenting (69)
  • Things That Suck (88)
  • Tributes (13)
  • What Not to Say (26)
  • Work (12)

Archives

  • ►2023 (17)
    • ► February (8)
      • Last Post: There's No Handbook For How to Do This
      • Letter to Shawn (Part 2)
      • From the Archives: On the Phone with My Dad
      • From the Archives: Aren't We Lucky?
      • From the Archives: Falling for Chris
      • From the Archives: Playing on the Roof
      • From the Archives: Claire Doesn't Want the Goldfish Crackers
      • From the Archives: To Me, She Glowed From Within
    • ► January (9)
      • Ask a Widow: Photos in the Bedroom
      • From the Archives: Dating...It's Just Like Improv!
      • Rule of Life
      • From the Archives: A First (Platonic) Night With Chris
      • From the Archives: Who Do You Want Raising Your Grandkids?
      • From the Archives: Baths and Bedtime with Grandpa Tom
      • He is Still Here with Me, with Us
      • From the Archives: Three-and-a-Half
      • ...Hello, 2023 (Part 2 of 2)
  • ►2022 (93)
    • ► December (9)
      • Adios, 2022... (Part 1 of 2)
      • From the Archives: Maybe She Will Be the One to Save Me
      • From the Archives: We Weren't a Broken Family
      • Hypochondriac
      • From the Archives: Dating and the Cabal
      • Moments of Pause
      • From the Archives: You Are Making Meaning Already
      • Any Day You Can Die
      • From the Archives: My Mom's Diary (Part 2 of 2)
    • ► November (8)
      • From the Archives: My Mom's Diary (Part 1 of 2)
      • Thanks on Thanksgiving
      • From the Archives: It’s Hard for People Who Don’t Know the Whole Story
      • From the Archives: Look Good in the ER
      • Ask a Widow: Dating With Kids
      • From the Archives: A Walk With My Dad
      • What Would He Be Like?
      • From the Archives: The Mindfulness and Grief Therapy Session
    • ► October (9)
      • Homesick
      • From the Archives: You're Doing the Hard Stuff
      • What If It's Better?
      • From the Archives: I Just Remembered That It's All Real
      • From the Archives: Kelly and Paige
      • Just Like You
      • His Smile
      • From the Archives: The Funeral Home
      • First Anniversary (600th blog post)
    • ► September (7)
      • From the Archives: Your Dad Died Last Night
      • Let's Make Light As a Family
      • From the Archives: That’s What We Have Right Now. Hope.
      • Parent 2 (Part 2)
      • From the Archives: Marjorie, What If I'm Dying?
      • Pico y Placa
      • The Power of Yet
    • ► August (2)
      • I'm a Widow. You'd Think I'd Be Better at Doing Hard Things. I'm Not.
      • Happy Birthday, Grandpa Tom
    • ► July (8)
      • Widowhood is Stressful. This Survey Proves It.
      • Along the Coastline
      • Ask a Widow: No One Is Ready
      • Ask a Widow: What Changes Do Remarriage and Adoption Bring?
      • Ask a Widow: When Sex Can Be Good...and When Sex Can Be Tricky
      • A Countdown Calendar for Grief?
      • That's What You Look For
      • How We Remember
    • ► June (8)
      • The Sewing Room
      • Shawn's Birthday, Year 5
      • They Were Happy Years for You
      • First Father's Day
      • Widows in Quarantine
      • Making Jam with Grandpa Tom
      • Hypotheticals
      • "I'm Dating a Widow..."
    • ► May (9)
      • Why I Write
      • It Is a Lie
      • "I'm Alone But I Ain't Lonely"
      • Things That Remain: Risk (Part 4 of 4)
      • Things That Remain: Accomplishment (Part 3 of 4)
      • We Will Not Look Away From You
      • Mother's Day, Year 5
      • When Auto-Fill Won't Cut It
      • You Carry the Passports
    • ► April (8)
      • Things That Remain: Fear (Part 2 of 4)
      • Things That Remain: Guilt (Part 1 of 4)
      • I Don’t Want Anyone to Know, But I Also Want Them to Be Happy for Me
      • Kids of His Own
      • Widow Time: Chronos and Kairos
      • What If My Grief Is Over?
      • What If?
      • They Remain for Me, Too
    • ► March (9)
      • Today, You Get the Ring
      • Acts of God?
      • The Disorder of Prolonged Grief - Does It Make Sense?
      • Benefits and Responsibilities
      • When He Is Theirs, and They Are His
      • Where I Want to Be
      • Three Kids, Two Dads
      • Things to do on a Deathiversary
      • National Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month
    • ► February (7)
      • 43
      • To All That Is to Be: Yes
      • She's His Daughter
      • You Are Us
      • Dreams of Shawn
      • What If He Dies? (Part 2)
      • "It's a Journey"
    • ► January (9)
      • What If He Dies?
      • Dog Poop at the Grocery Store: A Widow Metaphor
      • The Man at the Bank
      • Ask a Widow: Yes, It’s Okay to Want to Have Sex Again (Part 2)
      • Reasonable Positivity
      • Do You Have Any Memories of Your Dad Shawn?
      • My Body Still Knows
      • A Car for Our Future
      • Hello, 2022... (Part 2 of 2)
  • ►2021 (97)
    • ► December (6)
      • Goodbye, 2021... (Part 1 of 2)
      • See It to Believe It
      • Grief, Not Sadness
      • Ask a Widow: Why Does It Feel Like Cheating If He's Dead?
      • Other People's Joy
      • People You May Know
    • ► November (9)
      • Ask a Widow: "But We've Always Had Christmas at Grandma's" (with holiday resources)
      • Old Places, New Meanings
      • The Top 5 Reasons Thanksgiving Can Really Blow for Widows
      • Bring Meatballs
      • Feeling Bad That It Doesn't Feel Bad
      • I Am Happy, Like You Wanted
      • Totes in the Garage
      • No Thanks
      • Bride of Frankenstein
    • ► October (4)
      • Nun or Assassin? Your Guide to Widow Fashion!
      • No One's Looking at You
      • Claire's Wedding Speech
      • Share Joy
    • ► September (8)
      • 'Till Death Do Us Part
      • Witness Something Special
      • Ask a Widow: How Do Your Kids Think About Their (Dead) Dad When They Have a (New, Alive) Dad?
      • Warning: Bad Things Happen to Me
      • Ask a Widow: What to Say to a New Widow
      • Nana and Pop
      • What Does it Mean to Be a Dad?
      • If My Wedding is Cancelled, Then I Can Make Jury Duty
    • ► August (5)
      • The First Day of School, Part 2
      • Why? (On the Anniversary of My Mom's Death)
      • A New Look for DC Widow
      • Resources from DC Widow
      • Someday, I'll Watch Him Die (500th Blog Post)
    • ► July (8)
      • You Can Just Be Happy
      • Sh*t People Said That Just Wasn’t True*
      • Terry Gets a Tattoo
      • You'll Survive
      • The Clark Family, Part 2
      • Successes (Part 2 of 2)
      • Failures (Part 1 of 2)
      • What Happens to My Body When I Die?
    • ► June (8)
      • Shawn's Birthday, Year 4
      • International Widows Day
      • What Are You? (Father's Day, 2021)
      • A Hug, Finally
      • I Know You're Ready When You Tell Me You're Ready
      • To Update the Account, Part 2
      • Ask a Widow: What About the In-Laws?
      • The Glamorous Cabal of Widows
    • ► May (9)
      • To Read on Memorial Day
      • A New Life Insurance Plan! (An Annotated Reading of the Latest Letter to Our House)
      • A Happy Ending
      • The Anxiety is Real
      • The Pieces We Don't Know
      • A Review of “A Widow’s Guide to Healing” (Part 2)
      • Mother's Day, Year 4
      • Ask a Widow: Am I Moving Forward if I'm Still Angry?
      • Just Like Your Dad
    • ► April (9)
      • Springtime, Finally
      • Just Keep Doing It
      • Time Travel
      • The View From Across the Street
      • Single Parenting, Not Solo Parenting
      • A Conversation
      • We Are Everywhere
      • Easter Joy
      • Visitors to Your Grave
    • ► March (9)
      • Life is Unfair. But It Can Be Beautiful, Too.
      • It's Not Too Late to Say "Thank You"
      • It's Not Too Late to Say "I'm Sorry"
      • On Details and Memory
      • FaceTime with my Family
      • Weddings and Other Complicated Endeavors
      • Opinions on Kinetic Sand
      • Ask a Widow: Is This a Good Idea?
      • Guess Random Numbers
    • ► February (11)
      • 42
      • Seven Kisses
      • Ask a Widow: How Long Does It Take To Feel Better?
      • Ask a Widow: Why is Sex So Complicated?
      • Ask a Widow: Therapy and Grief
      • How We Met (A Valentine's Day Story)
      • Widowhood and Breakups
      • Widowhood, Dating and a Global Pandemic
      • Why Heat the House When I Can Wear a Hat?
      • I Am From
      • Guilt (Part 2)
    • ► January (11)
      • So Then Who Are You?
      • Death by Pork Butt
      • Holiday Cards (Part 2)
      • Accompany Me
      • The President We Need
      • Must Read This Week: Jamie Raskin
      • The Vaccine
      • Three Years
      • 2020 Vision Revisited
      • Now You Just Write Random Things
      • ...Hello, 2021 (Part 2 of 2)
  • ►2020 (152)
    • ► December (10)
      • 2020, It's Time to Go... (Part 1 of 2)
      • Kitchen Counter
      • Gingee
      • Promises
      • The Tree Sale
      • The Spot on the Bathroom Floor
      • Holiday Cards
      • He Makes the Coffee
      • Cold Pizza in the Back of the Mazda
      • Water and Fire
    • ► November (11)
      • Fierce Loyalty
      • Two Widows at the Orthodontist
      • Do You Know What's Hard?
      • It's Not All About the Last Day
      • Silence
      • Risk
      • The Exploding Whale
      • The Best Condolence Letter
      • His Kindness Will Echo
      • DC Widow Is Taking Today Off
      • Election Day 2020
    • ► October (13)
      • I'm Not a "Bike Widow"
      • Happy Birthday to My Mom
      • Letter to Shawn
      • Ask a Widow: Legacy (Part 2)
      • Ask a Widow: Legacy (Part 1)
      • The Price of Corn
      • Happy Birthday, Chris
      • That’s a Special Feeling
      • Make a Prediction (Part 2)
      • Four Years Ago
      • Want Less Judgmental Friends? Find Some Widows!
      • Make a Prediction
      • Hi, I'm Chris
    • ► September (13)
      • A Life That Sparkles (400th Blog Post)
      • The Danger of the Fast-Forward Button
      • I'm Not a Polygamist*
      • They Were So Little
      • Tell Me How To Do It (Tribute to Ruth Bader Ginsburg)
      • State of Exception
      • Room 9
      • Teachers, We Hear You
      • Relationship to Student
      • Austin's Hero
      • I Just Want to Know
      • The Room at the Hospital
      • Must Read This Week: Jesmyn Ward
    • ► August (13)
      • Family Resemblance
      • How Am I Actually Going to Do This?
      • Queen Anne's Lace
      • Ask a Widow: Could My Date Be a Father to My Kids?
      • What is Family?
      • What Kind of Beer Do I Like?
      • Cowboy Take Me Away
      • Letter to Myself: 1 Year (Part 3 of 3)
      • Letter to Myself: 6 Months (part 2 of 3)
      • Letter to Myself: 1 Month (part 1 of 3)
      • Why Widows Always Think About Death
      • Sometimes Bad Things Don't Happen
      • And Then I Am Crying
    • ► July (12)
      • Highs and Lows
      • Deserving It
      • You Can Do This. You Are Doing This.
      • Ask a Widow: How Do I Meet Other Young Widows?
      • It's Not Up To You
      • You're Not Really a Widow Anymore
      • The Earring
      • School and Single Parenting
      • What Does It Take to Date a Widow?
      • Safety
      • My Love Language
      • Who Would You Love More?
    • ► June (13)
      • Shawn's Birthday, Year 3
      • Ask a Widow: Dating is Hard When You Try to Predict the Future
      • How to Host a Crappy Zoom Call
      • Father's Day, Year 3
      • Tell Me About Him
      • You're Not Crazy. You're Grieving.
      • Put Your Dishes in the Dishwasher
      • "Making It"
      • I Miss My Dad
      • Congrats, Graduates of 2020
      • Three Grief Specialists to Follow Right Now
      • Two Widow Books You Should Read Right Now
      • My White Privilege
    • ► May (13)
      • Second, As In Again
      • 5th Grade Graduation
      • 3 am
      • How Does This Actually Work?
      • Ghosts in the Backyard
      • The 5 Friends a Widow Needs
      • How Widowed Parenting Prepared Me for Coronavirus Parenting
      • In My Driveway
      • Mother's Day, Year 3
      • Grandpa Tom's Jam
      • Teacher Appreciation
      • Hard Things Are Hard
      • My Nine-Year-Old Boy
    • ► April (13)
      • The Boy on the Bike
      • Being Alone is Scary
      • How (Not) to Date a Widow
      • Which Box Do I Check?
      • I'll Be Paying People Back for Carpool When I'm 80
      • The Bookshelf
      • Just in Case
      • I Can't Do This Anymore
      • I Wanna Dance With Somebody
      • Can I Take Out the Trash?
      • A Genuine Offer, Freely Given, With Gladness
      • Breaking Point
      • Ask a Widow: What If He's Not Shawn?
    • ► March (15)
      • Eleven
      • It's Not Something You Can Catch
      • Sore Throat
      • This Is Not a Referendum
      • Front Lines
      • Be Still. Listen.
      • Alone
      • Our Safe Space
      • 99%
      • My Babies Are Here With Me
      • Sometimes We Make Hard Choices When We Love Someone
      • An Imperfect Parent
      • Ask a Widow: What's So Hard With Online Dating?
      • I'm Still Alive!
      • Disaster Prep and the Coronavirus
    • ► February (12)
      • I Guess This Is What Healing Looks Like
      • The Happiest Place on Earth
      • 41
      • Out of the Corner of My Eye
      • Homework with Austin
      • Learning to Like Food...Again?
      • Valentine's Day, Year 3
      • Not Such a Guppy Anymore
      • Marjorie's Favorite Blog Posts (there are 300 now!)
      • My Name is Marjorie...
      • Table for Seven
      • That Super Bowl Google Ad
    • ► January (14)
      • Ask a Widow: How Do I Start to Date Again?
      • Emergency Contact
      • Musings on Heaven at Dinner
      • What About the Privilege?
      • Dear Insurance Company
      • Tough Love
      • 2020 Vision
      • Sometimes You Superglue It
      • Year of Yes Revisited
      • Remembering Shawn and The Tragically Hip
      • 2 Years Ago You Told Me This
      • Go on Vacation
      • Hey Married Lady! Here's What You Can Do To Support Your Single Friend
      • ...Hello 2020 (Part 2 of 2)
  • ►2019 (153)
    • ► December (13)
      • Goodbye, 2019... (Part 1 of 2)
      • Washing Dishes
      • Christmas Magic
      • Hallmark Christmas Movies
      • Ask a Widow: Navigating Friendships
      • You Are Alone. Accept That. Carry On. (Part 2)
      • Tommy's Christmas List
      • Excerpt from Marjorie's Speech, "Remembering Those We Love"
      • What Brought You to The Hospital Today?
      • Mysterious
      • I Keep Running
      • Speed Dating
      • The Warmth of Home
    • ► November (12)
      • My Body Knew
      • Ask a Widow: What to Do When You're a Widow and a Parent
      • My Widow Friend Abena
      • All Shawn Ever Wanted for Me
      • Just Marjorie and the Hash Run
      • Guilt
      • Ask a Widow: Yes, It's Okay to Want to Have Sex Again
      • Kindness
      • In a Hurry
      • Ask a Widow
      • Old and Young, At the Same Time
      • Trigger Warning
    • ► October (13)
      • The Avengers
      • Talking Football at the Kitchen Island
      • Grant Showed Us the Way
      • My Cross to Bear
      • In An Instant
      • And the Air Will Buzz Again
      • In the Middle
      • "If I Die, Please Get Remarried"
      • What's the Worst Thing That Can Happen?
      • October 10th
      • Marjorie's Favorite Grief Books
      • At First Glance
      • Grandpa Tom's Exercise Routine
    • ► September (13)
      • Zombies, Run
      • Lemonade
      • I Followed the Rules
      • When 5-Year-Olds Talk About Death
      • Costco, the Cemetery, and My Dad
      • I'm Not Getting a Dog
      • Ministry of Presence
      • So Close. And Yet So Far Away.
      • September 11, 2001
      • Grandpa Tom Returns
      • Do It When It Doesn't Make You Want To Throw Up
      • Home Base
      • From Standing to Dancing
    • ► August (13)
      • Do This, Because You Are Her Friend
      • Another Year Without My Mom
      • What My Kids Need At School This Year
      • The Man at the Gas Station
      • Flatwood Willie
      • Pistachio Nuts, Epipens and Friends
      • The Bear
      • Grilling
      • Kids That Could Be My Own
      • Can't You Just...?
      • "My Dad Died in the War"
      • Nights at the Kitchen Counter
      • Wisps of a Dream
    • ► July (14)
      • I Am Someone New, Too
      • What Austin Brought to Camp
      • Questions
      • Our Bathroom
      • What I'm Scared Of
      • Heavenly Love
      • Where’s Your Husband?
      • "Are You Going To Die?”
      • The Look of Real Love
      • The View in Portofino
      • Lost
      • Swimming in the Mediterranean Sea
      • Our 15th Wedding Anniversary
      • Shawn's Birthday, Year 2
    • ► June (12)
      • Sundance or Sunscreen?
      • Happiness Is For Other People
      • Team Brimley
      • Brave or Stupid
      • My 200th Blog Post
      • Father's Day, Year 2
      • The Last Day of School
      • Not a Shitty Husband
      • Marjorie's Graduation Speech
      • Soulmates and Other Things I Don't Believe In
      • Sick Day
      • The Day the Car Didn't Start
    • ► May (14)
      • Waiting for the Future
      • The Girl at the Coffee Shop
      • How Did You Cope?
      • The Oklahoma Clarks
      • Unaffected
      • Asparagus Cures Cancer
      • Tommy's Bike Ride
      • "It Hurt for Me"
      • Mother's Day, Year 2
      • One of the Most Important Things a School Can Do
      • The Worst Book I've Read in a Long Time
      • Zoe Keating's Concert
      • How My Son Found Family Across the Alley
      • The Talent Show
    • ► April (13)
      • The Little Things
      • The Clark Family
      • Heroic Work
      • Reflections at Your Grave on Easter Weekend
      • What (Not) to Say in Crisis
      • Sometimes There's a Little Vomit
      • The Closet
      • Rainbow Chicken
      • First Rental Car
      • New York, New York
      • Happy Now
      • Walk to the End of the Driveway
      • Colon Cancer Run
    • ► March (13)
      • "It's Okay, You Can Do It!"
      • Angry
      • You Are Alone. Accept That. Carry On.
      • Freak-Out Letter #6
      • He Pushed the Button
      • 24 Hours
      • It Might Not Happen For Me
      • Fleetwood Mac
      • Backsliding Into Grief
      • Running to the Door
      • Claire's New Email Address
      • I Am Doing Today
      • The Fans in the Stands
    • ► February (11)
      • Who Has a Better Life Than Us?
      • 40
      • Tommy's Birthday
      • Our Trip to the Waterpark
      • The Ensemble
      • Valentines Day
      • After a Year
      • Last Night
      • The Ring
      • Thestrals
      • Lullaby
    • ► January (12)
      • Careful
      • The Letter
      • Young Love
      • The Spelling Bee
      • Family
      • Across the Doctor's Office
      • Year of Yes
      • "I Want Daddy to Come Back"
      • When He Was Still Mine
      • In the Movie Version of My Life
      • "I Think He's Dying"
      • ….Hello 2019 (Part 2 of 2)
  • ►2018 (129)
    • ► December (13)
      • Good Riddance 2018…. (Part 1 of 2)
      • Home
      • Sweet Potato Fries
      • Christmas Eve
      • Just Because Your Husband Dies, You Don't Necessarily Get the Job
      • Salsa in my Cup
      • Decorating for Christmas
      • Santa Shawn
      • Lockdown
      • Shawn's Cancer Humor
      • Zombie Apocalypse
      • Strong
      • Stories for My Daughter
    • ► November (12)
      • One Year Later
      • Joy!
      • Watching “Widows”
      • Thanksgiving
      • More
      • Report Cards
      • Bill Brimley's Speech at CNAS in Honor of His Son, Shawn
      • Smash the Patriarchy
      • Field Trips, Open Houses and Other Events I Can't Attend Anymore
      • Shawn's Wife
      • What Would Shawn Do? (Election Day 2018)
      • Why I Might Have to Stop Reading "Mommy Blogs"
    • ► October (13)
      • Dad Is Not a Zombie
      • CNAS Tribute to Shawn (Part 2)
      • Guns and Cancer
      • Life advice from the aesthetician
      • It's Easy to Judge (100th Blog Post)
      • "Holistic Medicine" and Other Words I Never Used to Like
      • Austin and the Kittens
      • "Go To the Hospital"
      • Not My Domain
      • The Joshua Tree
      • Sorry For Your Loss: A Review
      • A Brutal Few Weeks
      • The Feminist in Our House
    • ► September (11)
      • My Garden
      • I Might As Well Get Cheaper Tires If My Husband Has to Be Dead
      • EMDR
      • Claire's Hero
      • Falling Trees
      • Reckless
      • Parent 2
      • We All Hurt
      • No Ma'am
      • The First Day of School, Part 2
      • Remembering Shawn as He Really Was
    • ► August (14)
      • Michele Flournoy's Eulogy of Shawn
      • Family photos
      • 20 Years
      • Talking to My Kids About Death, Again
      • Promises I Can’t Keep
      • The First Day of School
      • I Want to Die Right Now Because at Least Then I Wouldn’t Have to Carry Anyone Home After They Throw Up from Eating Too Much Ice Cream
      • Running With Anger
      • The Marine
      • A Beautiful Day
      • That Poor Girl
      • The Power of the Word "Widow"
      • Dear Girl on the Phone from UCLA
      • Weekend Shawn
    • ► July (13)
      • The Treadmill
      • Who's Saving Our Basement? (Part 2)
      • Reading with Claire
      • Why Being a Widowed Single Mom is So Hard
      • Single
      • Nana
      • The Scar
      • A Review of "A Widow's Guide to Healing"
      • Run Away
      • 6 Months
      • Go, Go, Go
      • An Anniversary of Sorts
      • What If the Plane Crashes?
    • ► June (13)
      • Shawn's Birthday, Part 2
      • Shawn's Birthday
      • 5 Stars
      • CNAS Tribute to Shawn
      • Brussels Sprouts
      • Father's Day
      • You're Not Bothering Me
      • It's Just Me
      • So Proud
      • Do You Know What Makes Me Nervous?
      • Grandpa Tom
      • 90s Party
      • An Uncomfortable Reality
    • ► May (12)
      • Full Time
      • Where Should We Begin?
      • Brave Through It
      • Peace Be With You
      • Pooping on the Potty
      • Why Do All the Damn Parents Die in Disney movies?
      • Mother's Day
      • Who Am I?
      • I Turned Out Okay
      • Our Forever House
      • I'm Not Sure How You Survive That
      • Riding Bikes
    • ► April (13)
      • My Flawed Husband
      • To Update the Account
      • I'm Not Grateful
      • Frozen
      • It Doesn't Matter
      • The Last Perfect Weekend
      • Keep Walking Past That Door
      • Press Fast-Forward
      • "You look hot, by the way"
      • My First Sleepover Birthday Party
      • It Can Always Get Worse
      • There's No Crying at the Swim-Up Bar
      • One King Bed
    • ► March (12)
      • Straight to Heaven
      • I Knew You Before
      • Why I Can't Call You Back
      • All Kinds of Therapy
      • First Day Back
      • It's Not "Better"
      • The Guitar Lesson Guy
      • Who's Saving Our Basement?
      • The Little Hand on My Back
      • There's Only One Option, and This Is It
      • My Eulogy of Shawn
      • “I’m at Trader Joe's, What Do You Need?”
    • ► February (3)
      • Costco and the Cemetery
      • Chuck E. Cheese and Jury Duty
      • My 39th Birthday...
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