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The Happiest Place on Earth
“Tommy, listen to me,” I said very seriously as we sat on the plane down to Florida, “you are going to have to walk a lot on this trip. Mama can’t carry you all the time, and you’ll have to stay with our family. There will be a lot of people and I don’t want you getting lost.” Tommy looked at me and earnestly nodded his head. I knew he was really excited. Claire and Austin squealed behind us. Just a few hours prior, I’d announced that instead of a few days at a local indoor waterpark, we were headed to DisneyWorld for a week! I couldn’t believe I’d managed…
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Learning to Like Food…Again?
For much of my life, I claimed that I’d rather take a pill than eat a meal. My friends and my husband thought I was insane. “But food is so enjoyable!” they’d say to me, and point out all the fun restaurants in DC. I held firm. Yes, sometimes I enjoyed a good meal, but often, I just wanted to continue on with my day, uninterrupted by the need to eat. Part of this was being a busy mom who hated cooking things my kids wouldn’t eat. Part of this is the fact that I have a food allergy, which can make eating a bit scary. But still – my…
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Not Such a Guppy Anymore
For weeks leading up to the tryouts for the elementary school musical, The Little Mermaid, Claire kept telling me how much she was hoping to be cast as Flounder. (As a note, Flounder is the small fish who is Ariel’s best friend.) When I wondered whether she might rather want to be Ursula or Ariel, she remained firm that Flounder was the best role for her. We talked about how she might be cast in the ensemble, like last year, and she said that she would be happy with any role. But when she found out that yes, she had been cast as Flounder, she was over-the-moon. And in case…
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2020 Vision
I’ve always loved New Year’s Resolutions. I love the idea that I am striving for something new, looking to constantly improve, and taking on a new challenge. One year, when I was in my 20s, I made a resolution to visit a dozen new countries. Another year, when my kids were all really small, I aimed to cook a real dinner every other night. In 2017, Shawn and I both decided that we were going to throw more parties and spend more time with our friends. 2017 was my last year of New Year’s Resolutions. When people would talk about resolutions in 2018, I merely said, “my goal is to…
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Year of Yes Revisited
2019 was the “Year of Yes“. Or at least that’s what I wanted it to be. 2018 had been the year of cancer and death and survival. It was terrible, and all I wanted to do was fast-forward through the year. When 2019 arrived, I thought, “okay, it’s time to actually live this life I’ve been given.” And the way I was going to do that was to try everything. Could I run further than the three miles I usually ran? Maybe just an extra mile, or maybe three or four more? I could. Could I let go a little, take a risk and try out a new man? And…
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…Hello 2020 (Part 2 of 2)
Hello 2020. Hello widow friends. I’m sorry we met. But I’m glad I know you. Hello nights that last until 2 am. Sometimes because they are sad. But more often, because they are fun. Hello to being alone. Not lonely. But alone. I’m finally learning the difference. Hello anger, sadness, grief and fear. You all have a place in my life. You just don’t get to rule it. Hello risk. Hello to saying no, and feeling okay about it. I know what I can handle now, and I know what I cannot. Hello 41. I’ll finally be older than Shawn ever was. I’m going to make it count. Hello to…
There’s No Handbook for How to Do This
