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In a Hurry
Since I was a little girl, all I really wanted in this life was to be a mom. Sure, I wanted to be other things – a world traveler and a teacher and a great hostess. But more than any of this, I wanted to be a mom. I knew what this meant – I’d need to meet someone when I was relatively young, get married, and then have kids, hopefully all before I was 30. Thank God I met Shawn. I swear, I might have married anyone at 22. But I met him, and my life was amazingly more interesting than it would have been otherwise. We were both…
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I’m Not Getting a Dog
I was out on my morning run the other day and I saw a woman about my age walking her Golden Retriever. It was a beautiful dog, and the woman, dressed in casual walking shoes and an old t-shirt from a local university, looked content. She sported a large wedding ring and smiled at me as I ran by her. I waved. I don’t know this woman at all, but I know this – she looked happy. And she clearly loved that dog. It reminded me of a conversation I had with Shawn a few years prior. Claire’s recent blood test had shown that the allergy shots were working for…
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Shawn’s Birthday, Year 2
“It’s hot!” Claire said just after she touched her food. We were spending the day in France and Monaco. Just before sitting down for a late-morning snack, we’d hiked to a beautiful outlook. From the top, we could see a gorgeous view of the French Riviera. I was dumbstruck, but the kids were mostly hot and hungry, because, well, they are kids. So we found a little café nearby and I ordered croissants for everyone. It took a long time because they made them from scratch and then brought them out straight from the oven. “Just take a small piece to eat,” I told Claire. She took one bite and…
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Happiness Is For Other People
“I need space,” he said. “I need to see you,” you replied. “I need time,” he said. “I need to see you,” you replied again. He pulled. You pushed. It became clear that it was ending and yet you held on to the hope that it was not. “Please don’t let this fall apart,” you thought. Maybe you even said it out loud. But it was over. That brief affair, the one that had helped you through the darkest days of winter, was fading as the spring approached. And you were heartbroken. Your friends tried to console you. “You will find love again,” they said. But they didn’t know. They…
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The Worst Book I’ve Read in a Long Time
Dear book club: I’m sorry I’m slamming our book. I know most of you also disliked it, so that helps. But if you liked it, if you got something out of it – that’s great. It’s just that, well…..I hated it. “Girl, Wash Your Face” is the worst book I’ve read in a long time. It’s been slammed elsewhere, which I didn’t know when I started reading the book. So maybe this review isn’t super unique, but I still have to add my two cents. The book, which is a kind of self-improvement book, centers around the idea that each one of us can decide to be happy. As the…
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Rainbow Chicken
I know I keep writing about it, but wow, March was HARD. I cried more than I’d cried in months, and I had moments when I wasn’t sure if I was going to be okay in the long-term. I had terrible anxiety at night and walked around like a bit of a zombie during the day. But I convinced myself that my kids didn’t really notice. Or if they did, they didn’t care that much. They still had school and their friends and my dad. So what if their mom was a little bit off? Claire asked how I was doing a few times, and I was honest that I…
There’s No Handbook for How to Do This
