DC Widow

There’s No Handbook for How to Do This

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  • DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley Hale marries Chris
    Love and Chris

    First Anniversary (600th blog post)

    October 2, 2022 /

    When Chris and I first started dating, I emphatically told him that I didn’t want to get married again. At that point, it had been over two years since Shawn died, and over that time, a lot had changed. In early widowhood, I imagined that some day, I’d get remarried. In fact, this lasted for almost the entire first year after Shawn died. At that time, I wanted to get married again for no real other reason than that I wanted someone to save me from the life I was living. Save me from single parenting. Save me from being one of a few solo parents at the elementary school…

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    M Brimley

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    School supplies for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley

    School and Single Parenting

    July 15, 2020
    Son of DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley as a baby

    You’re Not Crazy. You’re Grieving.

    June 17, 2020
    Fall leaves at wedding for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley

    ‘Till Death Do Us Part

    September 27, 2021
  • DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley Hale hugs friend Michelle at night
    New Perspectives

    I’m a Widow. You’d Think I’d Be Better at Doing Hard Things. I’m Not.

    August 4, 2022 /

    I’m about to do something really hard. And I’m a tiny bit nervous. Okay, I’m more than a tiny bit nervous. If I’m being honest, I’m legitimately anxious about this next step. It’s a big, hard step. And doing hard things is scary. It’s not like I’ve never done hard things. I lived with a mentally ill mother who died by suicide. And then I got married and had three kids and then my husband died. And then I dealt with everything that widowhood brings. And I survived it. I even found love again. Which was wonderful…and also, it was sometimes scary. Any big changes can be scary, I know…

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    M Brimley

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    DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley Hale and husband Chris

    Share Joy

    October 18, 2021
    DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley hugs son Austin in front of Supreme Court

    Tell Me How To Do It (Tribute to Ruth Bader Ginsburg)

    September 21, 2020
    Couple on bench for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley Hale

    “I’m Dating a Widow…”

    June 2, 2022
  • Boxes for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley Hale
    Things That Suck

    Widowhood is Stressful. This Survey Proves It.

    July 28, 2022 /

    It wasn’t until after Shawn died that I realized my hair had been falling out. The bald spots on my head were growing, once again. Because that’s what every newly widowed 38-year-old wants….to be bald! It was like the universe or God or something was just adding yet another “fuck you” to the list of things that could go wrong in my life. Wasn’t it bad enough that my husband had just died? Now I had to contend with a bald spot that was spreading? Stress causes me to lose my hair. (Luckily, it’s mostly in the back of my head, but sometimes the spots can get really big.) This,…

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    M Brimley

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    Grandpa Tom buys strawberries for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley Hale

    Happy Birthday, Grandpa Tom

    August 1, 2022
    DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley Hale dressed as bride of frankenstein

    Bride of Frankenstein

    November 1, 2021
    Father of DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley reaches into backpack

    An Imperfect Parent

    March 9, 2020
  • Sea by Eastport for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley Hale
    New Perspectives

    Along the Coastline

    July 25, 2022 /

    The music was loud and the wind whipped through the car as we drove north. Chris and I had dropped our kids at overnight camp in Maine and had a weekend to ourselves. The scenery, especially as we neared the border, was spectacular. We were in Eastport (“Easternmost city in the United States!“) and it seemed that all that was ahead of us was the sea and the Canadian provinces of New Brunswick and Nova Scotia. “Shawn always said Nova Scotia was the most beautiful place in the world,” I said to Chris. “He wanted to take me there. But I can’t imagine it being more beautiful than this.” “Well,…

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    M Brimley

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    Marjorie Brimley on beach as a young widow

    One King Bed

    April 1, 2018
    Cemetery of DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley

    What Happens to My Body When I Die?

    July 1, 2021
    Food on table for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley

    Highs and Lows

    July 31, 2020
  • People in coffeeshop for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley Hale
    Ask A Widow,  Dating

    Ask a Widow: No One Is Ready

    July 21, 2022 /

    How do you know that you’re ready to date after loss? It’s one of the most common questions I get. In fact, just the other day, I got this (edited) email from a widow who had recently become interested in someone new. It had been about 18 months after the death of her husband. It left her with some conflicting feelings: I mean, I really like the guy, but my emotions can go overboard – I grieve, I like him as a friend, I want him as a boyfriend, I just want him as a friend, etc. This is tiring me out and I don’t know how to manage. Maybe…

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    M Brimley

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    Bar image for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley Hale

    I Don’t Want Anyone to Know, But I Also Want Them to Be Happy for Me

    April 21, 2022
    Child of DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley lying on couch under blanket

    So Close. And Yet So Far Away.

    September 13, 2019
    DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley with her husband and child on the day she became a mom

    Mother’s Day, Year 2

    May 12, 2019
  • Blurred night cityscape for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley Hale
    Ask A Widow,  Dating

    Ask a Widow: When Sex Can Be Good…and When Sex Can Be Tricky

    July 14, 2022 /

    I know a lot of widows who think a lot about sex. I’m not talking about any specific group of widows. I hear from people of all ages and backgrounds and life experiences on this blog, and one of the most common things people write to me about is sex. Is it okay to want to have sex after (fill-in-the-blank-amount-of-time) has passed since your partner died? Is it strange to desire people who you would have never desired before widowhood? Is it totally off-base to date a friend or a neighbor? Some questions are easy to answer. Anything about feelings (i.e. “is it okay to feel this way”) is easy.…

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    M Brimley

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    DC widow blog writer Marjorie Brimley and her friend Paige on the beach

    From Standing to Dancing

    September 2, 2019
    Bedroom with bed for blog by DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley Hale

    Ask a Widow: Photos in the Bedroom

    January 30, 2023
    Grandpa Tom, father of DC widow writer Marjorie Brimley Hale

    From the Archives: Claire Doesn’t Want the Goldfish Crackers

    February 6, 2023
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About Me

I’m Marjorie Brimley, mother of three and high-school teacher in Washington, D.C., and this is the blog I never thought I’d have to write.

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Categories

  • Ask A Widow (30)
  • Dating (26)
  • Family & Friends (88)
  • From the Archives (28)
  • Holidays (69)
  • Love and Chris (25)
  • Missing Shawn (64)
  • New Perspectives (107)
  • Parenting (69)
  • Things That Suck (88)
  • Tributes (13)
  • What Not to Say (26)
  • Work (12)

Archives

  • ►2023 (17)
    • ► February (8)
      • Last Post: There's No Handbook For How to Do This
      • Letter to Shawn (Part 2)
      • From the Archives: On the Phone with My Dad
      • From the Archives: Aren't We Lucky?
      • From the Archives: Falling for Chris
      • From the Archives: Playing on the Roof
      • From the Archives: Claire Doesn't Want the Goldfish Crackers
      • From the Archives: To Me, She Glowed From Within
    • ► January (9)
      • Ask a Widow: Photos in the Bedroom
      • From the Archives: Dating...It's Just Like Improv!
      • Rule of Life
      • From the Archives: A First (Platonic) Night With Chris
      • From the Archives: Who Do You Want Raising Your Grandkids?
      • From the Archives: Baths and Bedtime with Grandpa Tom
      • He is Still Here with Me, with Us
      • From the Archives: Three-and-a-Half
      • ...Hello, 2023 (Part 2 of 2)
  • ►2022 (93)
    • ► December (9)
      • Adios, 2022... (Part 1 of 2)
      • From the Archives: Maybe She Will Be the One to Save Me
      • From the Archives: We Weren't a Broken Family
      • Hypochondriac
      • From the Archives: Dating and the Cabal
      • Moments of Pause
      • From the Archives: You Are Making Meaning Already
      • Any Day You Can Die
      • From the Archives: My Mom's Diary (Part 2 of 2)
    • ► November (8)
      • From the Archives: My Mom's Diary (Part 1 of 2)
      • Thanks on Thanksgiving
      • From the Archives: It’s Hard for People Who Don’t Know the Whole Story
      • From the Archives: Look Good in the ER
      • Ask a Widow: Dating With Kids
      • From the Archives: A Walk With My Dad
      • What Would He Be Like?
      • From the Archives: The Mindfulness and Grief Therapy Session
    • ► October (9)
      • Homesick
      • From the Archives: You're Doing the Hard Stuff
      • What If It's Better?
      • From the Archives: I Just Remembered That It's All Real
      • From the Archives: Kelly and Paige
      • Just Like You
      • His Smile
      • From the Archives: The Funeral Home
      • First Anniversary (600th blog post)
    • ► September (7)
      • From the Archives: Your Dad Died Last Night
      • Let's Make Light As a Family
      • From the Archives: That’s What We Have Right Now. Hope.
      • Parent 2 (Part 2)
      • From the Archives: Marjorie, What If I'm Dying?
      • Pico y Placa
      • The Power of Yet
    • ► August (2)
      • I'm a Widow. You'd Think I'd Be Better at Doing Hard Things. I'm Not.
      • Happy Birthday, Grandpa Tom
    • ► July (8)
      • Widowhood is Stressful. This Survey Proves It.
      • Along the Coastline
      • Ask a Widow: No One Is Ready
      • Ask a Widow: What Changes Do Remarriage and Adoption Bring?
      • Ask a Widow: When Sex Can Be Good...and When Sex Can Be Tricky
      • A Countdown Calendar for Grief?
      • That's What You Look For
      • How We Remember
    • ► June (8)
      • The Sewing Room
      • Shawn's Birthday, Year 5
      • They Were Happy Years for You
      • First Father's Day
      • Widows in Quarantine
      • Making Jam with Grandpa Tom
      • Hypotheticals
      • "I'm Dating a Widow..."
    • ► May (9)
      • Why I Write
      • It Is a Lie
      • "I'm Alone But I Ain't Lonely"
      • Things That Remain: Risk (Part 4 of 4)
      • Things That Remain: Accomplishment (Part 3 of 4)
      • We Will Not Look Away From You
      • Mother's Day, Year 5
      • When Auto-Fill Won't Cut It
      • You Carry the Passports
    • ► April (8)
      • Things That Remain: Fear (Part 2 of 4)
      • Things That Remain: Guilt (Part 1 of 4)
      • I Don’t Want Anyone to Know, But I Also Want Them to Be Happy for Me
      • Kids of His Own
      • Widow Time: Chronos and Kairos
      • What If My Grief Is Over?
      • What If?
      • They Remain for Me, Too
    • ► March (9)
      • Today, You Get the Ring
      • Acts of God?
      • The Disorder of Prolonged Grief - Does It Make Sense?
      • Benefits and Responsibilities
      • When He Is Theirs, and They Are His
      • Where I Want to Be
      • Three Kids, Two Dads
      • Things to do on a Deathiversary
      • National Colorectal Cancer Awareness Month
    • ► February (7)
      • 43
      • To All That Is to Be: Yes
      • She's His Daughter
      • You Are Us
      • Dreams of Shawn
      • What If He Dies? (Part 2)
      • "It's a Journey"
    • ► January (9)
      • What If He Dies?
      • Dog Poop at the Grocery Store: A Widow Metaphor
      • The Man at the Bank
      • Ask a Widow: Yes, It’s Okay to Want to Have Sex Again (Part 2)
      • Reasonable Positivity
      • Do You Have Any Memories of Your Dad Shawn?
      • My Body Still Knows
      • A Car for Our Future
      • Hello, 2022... (Part 2 of 2)
  • ►2021 (97)
    • ► December (6)
      • Goodbye, 2021... (Part 1 of 2)
      • See It to Believe It
      • Grief, Not Sadness
      • Ask a Widow: Why Does It Feel Like Cheating If He's Dead?
      • Other People's Joy
      • People You May Know
    • ► November (9)
      • Ask a Widow: "But We've Always Had Christmas at Grandma's" (with holiday resources)
      • Old Places, New Meanings
      • The Top 5 Reasons Thanksgiving Can Really Blow for Widows
      • Bring Meatballs
      • Feeling Bad That It Doesn't Feel Bad
      • I Am Happy, Like You Wanted
      • Totes in the Garage
      • No Thanks
      • Bride of Frankenstein
    • ► October (4)
      • Nun or Assassin? Your Guide to Widow Fashion!
      • No One's Looking at You
      • Claire's Wedding Speech
      • Share Joy
    • ► September (8)
      • 'Till Death Do Us Part
      • Witness Something Special
      • Ask a Widow: How Do Your Kids Think About Their (Dead) Dad When They Have a (New, Alive) Dad?
      • Warning: Bad Things Happen to Me
      • Ask a Widow: What to Say to a New Widow
      • Nana and Pop
      • What Does it Mean to Be a Dad?
      • If My Wedding is Cancelled, Then I Can Make Jury Duty
    • ► August (5)
      • The First Day of School, Part 2
      • Why? (On the Anniversary of My Mom's Death)
      • A New Look for DC Widow
      • Resources from DC Widow
      • Someday, I'll Watch Him Die (500th Blog Post)
    • ► July (8)
      • You Can Just Be Happy
      • Sh*t People Said That Just Wasn’t True*
      • Terry Gets a Tattoo
      • You'll Survive
      • The Clark Family, Part 2
      • Successes (Part 2 of 2)
      • Failures (Part 1 of 2)
      • What Happens to My Body When I Die?
    • ► June (8)
      • Shawn's Birthday, Year 4
      • International Widows Day
      • What Are You? (Father's Day, 2021)
      • A Hug, Finally
      • I Know You're Ready When You Tell Me You're Ready
      • To Update the Account, Part 2
      • Ask a Widow: What About the In-Laws?
      • The Glamorous Cabal of Widows
    • ► May (9)
      • To Read on Memorial Day
      • A New Life Insurance Plan! (An Annotated Reading of the Latest Letter to Our House)
      • A Happy Ending
      • The Anxiety is Real
      • The Pieces We Don't Know
      • A Review of “A Widow’s Guide to Healing” (Part 2)
      • Mother's Day, Year 4
      • Ask a Widow: Am I Moving Forward if I'm Still Angry?
      • Just Like Your Dad
    • ► April (9)
      • Springtime, Finally
      • Just Keep Doing It
      • Time Travel
      • The View From Across the Street
      • Single Parenting, Not Solo Parenting
      • A Conversation
      • We Are Everywhere
      • Easter Joy
      • Visitors to Your Grave
    • ► March (9)
      • Life is Unfair. But It Can Be Beautiful, Too.
      • It's Not Too Late to Say "Thank You"
      • It's Not Too Late to Say "I'm Sorry"
      • On Details and Memory
      • FaceTime with my Family
      • Weddings and Other Complicated Endeavors
      • Opinions on Kinetic Sand
      • Ask a Widow: Is This a Good Idea?
      • Guess Random Numbers
    • ► February (11)
      • 42
      • Seven Kisses
      • Ask a Widow: How Long Does It Take To Feel Better?
      • Ask a Widow: Why is Sex So Complicated?
      • Ask a Widow: Therapy and Grief
      • How We Met (A Valentine's Day Story)
      • Widowhood and Breakups
      • Widowhood, Dating and a Global Pandemic
      • Why Heat the House When I Can Wear a Hat?
      • I Am From
      • Guilt (Part 2)
    • ► January (11)
      • So Then Who Are You?
      • Death by Pork Butt
      • Holiday Cards (Part 2)
      • Accompany Me
      • The President We Need
      • Must Read This Week: Jamie Raskin
      • The Vaccine
      • Three Years
      • 2020 Vision Revisited
      • Now You Just Write Random Things
      • ...Hello, 2021 (Part 2 of 2)
  • ►2020 (152)
    • ► December (10)
      • 2020, It's Time to Go... (Part 1 of 2)
      • Kitchen Counter
      • Gingee
      • Promises
      • The Tree Sale
      • The Spot on the Bathroom Floor
      • Holiday Cards
      • He Makes the Coffee
      • Cold Pizza in the Back of the Mazda
      • Water and Fire
    • ► November (11)
      • Fierce Loyalty
      • Two Widows at the Orthodontist
      • Do You Know What's Hard?
      • It's Not All About the Last Day
      • Silence
      • Risk
      • The Exploding Whale
      • The Best Condolence Letter
      • His Kindness Will Echo
      • DC Widow Is Taking Today Off
      • Election Day 2020
    • ► October (13)
      • I'm Not a "Bike Widow"
      • Happy Birthday to My Mom
      • Letter to Shawn
      • Ask a Widow: Legacy (Part 2)
      • Ask a Widow: Legacy (Part 1)
      • The Price of Corn
      • Happy Birthday, Chris
      • That’s a Special Feeling
      • Make a Prediction (Part 2)
      • Four Years Ago
      • Want Less Judgmental Friends? Find Some Widows!
      • Make a Prediction
      • Hi, I'm Chris
    • ► September (13)
      • A Life That Sparkles (400th Blog Post)
      • The Danger of the Fast-Forward Button
      • I'm Not a Polygamist*
      • They Were So Little
      • Tell Me How To Do It (Tribute to Ruth Bader Ginsburg)
      • State of Exception
      • Room 9
      • Teachers, We Hear You
      • Relationship to Student
      • Austin's Hero
      • I Just Want to Know
      • The Room at the Hospital
      • Must Read This Week: Jesmyn Ward
    • ► August (13)
      • Family Resemblance
      • How Am I Actually Going to Do This?
      • Queen Anne's Lace
      • Ask a Widow: Could My Date Be a Father to My Kids?
      • What is Family?
      • What Kind of Beer Do I Like?
      • Cowboy Take Me Away
      • Letter to Myself: 1 Year (Part 3 of 3)
      • Letter to Myself: 6 Months (part 2 of 3)
      • Letter to Myself: 1 Month (part 1 of 3)
      • Why Widows Always Think About Death
      • Sometimes Bad Things Don't Happen
      • And Then I Am Crying
    • ► July (12)
      • Highs and Lows
      • Deserving It
      • You Can Do This. You Are Doing This.
      • Ask a Widow: How Do I Meet Other Young Widows?
      • It's Not Up To You
      • You're Not Really a Widow Anymore
      • The Earring
      • School and Single Parenting
      • What Does It Take to Date a Widow?
      • Safety
      • My Love Language
      • Who Would You Love More?
    • ► June (13)
      • Shawn's Birthday, Year 3
      • Ask a Widow: Dating is Hard When You Try to Predict the Future
      • How to Host a Crappy Zoom Call
      • Father's Day, Year 3
      • Tell Me About Him
      • You're Not Crazy. You're Grieving.
      • Put Your Dishes in the Dishwasher
      • "Making It"
      • I Miss My Dad
      • Congrats, Graduates of 2020
      • Three Grief Specialists to Follow Right Now
      • Two Widow Books You Should Read Right Now
      • My White Privilege
    • ► May (13)
      • Second, As In Again
      • 5th Grade Graduation
      • 3 am
      • How Does This Actually Work?
      • Ghosts in the Backyard
      • The 5 Friends a Widow Needs
      • How Widowed Parenting Prepared Me for Coronavirus Parenting
      • In My Driveway
      • Mother's Day, Year 3
      • Grandpa Tom's Jam
      • Teacher Appreciation
      • Hard Things Are Hard
      • My Nine-Year-Old Boy
    • ► April (13)
      • The Boy on the Bike
      • Being Alone is Scary
      • How (Not) to Date a Widow
      • Which Box Do I Check?
      • I'll Be Paying People Back for Carpool When I'm 80
      • The Bookshelf
      • Just in Case
      • I Can't Do This Anymore
      • I Wanna Dance With Somebody
      • Can I Take Out the Trash?
      • A Genuine Offer, Freely Given, With Gladness
      • Breaking Point
      • Ask a Widow: What If He's Not Shawn?
    • ► March (15)
      • Eleven
      • It's Not Something You Can Catch
      • Sore Throat
      • This Is Not a Referendum
      • Front Lines
      • Be Still. Listen.
      • Alone
      • Our Safe Space
      • 99%
      • My Babies Are Here With Me
      • Sometimes We Make Hard Choices When We Love Someone
      • An Imperfect Parent
      • Ask a Widow: What's So Hard With Online Dating?
      • I'm Still Alive!
      • Disaster Prep and the Coronavirus
    • ► February (12)
      • I Guess This Is What Healing Looks Like
      • The Happiest Place on Earth
      • 41
      • Out of the Corner of My Eye
      • Homework with Austin
      • Learning to Like Food...Again?
      • Valentine's Day, Year 3
      • Not Such a Guppy Anymore
      • Marjorie's Favorite Blog Posts (there are 300 now!)
      • My Name is Marjorie...
      • Table for Seven
      • That Super Bowl Google Ad
    • ► January (14)
      • Ask a Widow: How Do I Start to Date Again?
      • Emergency Contact
      • Musings on Heaven at Dinner
      • What About the Privilege?
      • Dear Insurance Company
      • Tough Love
      • 2020 Vision
      • Sometimes You Superglue It
      • Year of Yes Revisited
      • Remembering Shawn and The Tragically Hip
      • 2 Years Ago You Told Me This
      • Go on Vacation
      • Hey Married Lady! Here's What You Can Do To Support Your Single Friend
      • ...Hello 2020 (Part 2 of 2)
  • ►2019 (153)
    • ► December (13)
      • Goodbye, 2019... (Part 1 of 2)
      • Washing Dishes
      • Christmas Magic
      • Hallmark Christmas Movies
      • Ask a Widow: Navigating Friendships
      • You Are Alone. Accept That. Carry On. (Part 2)
      • Tommy's Christmas List
      • Excerpt from Marjorie's Speech, "Remembering Those We Love"
      • What Brought You to The Hospital Today?
      • Mysterious
      • I Keep Running
      • Speed Dating
      • The Warmth of Home
    • ► November (12)
      • My Body Knew
      • Ask a Widow: What to Do When You're a Widow and a Parent
      • My Widow Friend Abena
      • All Shawn Ever Wanted for Me
      • Just Marjorie and the Hash Run
      • Guilt
      • Ask a Widow: Yes, It's Okay to Want to Have Sex Again
      • Kindness
      • In a Hurry
      • Ask a Widow
      • Old and Young, At the Same Time
      • Trigger Warning
    • ► October (13)
      • The Avengers
      • Talking Football at the Kitchen Island
      • Grant Showed Us the Way
      • My Cross to Bear
      • In An Instant
      • And the Air Will Buzz Again
      • In the Middle
      • "If I Die, Please Get Remarried"
      • What's the Worst Thing That Can Happen?
      • October 10th
      • Marjorie's Favorite Grief Books
      • At First Glance
      • Grandpa Tom's Exercise Routine
    • ► September (13)
      • Zombies, Run
      • Lemonade
      • I Followed the Rules
      • When 5-Year-Olds Talk About Death
      • Costco, the Cemetery, and My Dad
      • I'm Not Getting a Dog
      • Ministry of Presence
      • So Close. And Yet So Far Away.
      • September 11, 2001
      • Grandpa Tom Returns
      • Do It When It Doesn't Make You Want To Throw Up
      • Home Base
      • From Standing to Dancing
    • ► August (13)
      • Do This, Because You Are Her Friend
      • Another Year Without My Mom
      • What My Kids Need At School This Year
      • The Man at the Gas Station
      • Flatwood Willie
      • Pistachio Nuts, Epipens and Friends
      • The Bear
      • Grilling
      • Kids That Could Be My Own
      • Can't You Just...?
      • "My Dad Died in the War"
      • Nights at the Kitchen Counter
      • Wisps of a Dream
    • ► July (14)
      • I Am Someone New, Too
      • What Austin Brought to Camp
      • Questions
      • Our Bathroom
      • What I'm Scared Of
      • Heavenly Love
      • Where’s Your Husband?
      • "Are You Going To Die?”
      • The Look of Real Love
      • The View in Portofino
      • Lost
      • Swimming in the Mediterranean Sea
      • Our 15th Wedding Anniversary
      • Shawn's Birthday, Year 2
    • ► June (12)
      • Sundance or Sunscreen?
      • Happiness Is For Other People
      • Team Brimley
      • Brave or Stupid
      • My 200th Blog Post
      • Father's Day, Year 2
      • The Last Day of School
      • Not a Shitty Husband
      • Marjorie's Graduation Speech
      • Soulmates and Other Things I Don't Believe In
      • Sick Day
      • The Day the Car Didn't Start
    • ► May (14)
      • Waiting for the Future
      • The Girl at the Coffee Shop
      • How Did You Cope?
      • The Oklahoma Clarks
      • Unaffected
      • Asparagus Cures Cancer
      • Tommy's Bike Ride
      • "It Hurt for Me"
      • Mother's Day, Year 2
      • One of the Most Important Things a School Can Do
      • The Worst Book I've Read in a Long Time
      • Zoe Keating's Concert
      • How My Son Found Family Across the Alley
      • The Talent Show
    • ► April (13)
      • The Little Things
      • The Clark Family
      • Heroic Work
      • Reflections at Your Grave on Easter Weekend
      • What (Not) to Say in Crisis
      • Sometimes There's a Little Vomit
      • The Closet
      • Rainbow Chicken
      • First Rental Car
      • New York, New York
      • Happy Now
      • Walk to the End of the Driveway
      • Colon Cancer Run
    • ► March (13)
      • "It's Okay, You Can Do It!"
      • Angry
      • You Are Alone. Accept That. Carry On.
      • Freak-Out Letter #6
      • He Pushed the Button
      • 24 Hours
      • It Might Not Happen For Me
      • Fleetwood Mac
      • Backsliding Into Grief
      • Running to the Door
      • Claire's New Email Address
      • I Am Doing Today
      • The Fans in the Stands
    • ► February (11)
      • Who Has a Better Life Than Us?
      • 40
      • Tommy's Birthday
      • Our Trip to the Waterpark
      • The Ensemble
      • Valentines Day
      • After a Year
      • Last Night
      • The Ring
      • Thestrals
      • Lullaby
    • ► January (12)
      • Careful
      • The Letter
      • Young Love
      • The Spelling Bee
      • Family
      • Across the Doctor's Office
      • Year of Yes
      • "I Want Daddy to Come Back"
      • When He Was Still Mine
      • In the Movie Version of My Life
      • "I Think He's Dying"
      • ….Hello 2019 (Part 2 of 2)
  • ►2018 (129)
    • ► December (13)
      • Good Riddance 2018…. (Part 1 of 2)
      • Home
      • Sweet Potato Fries
      • Christmas Eve
      • Just Because Your Husband Dies, You Don't Necessarily Get the Job
      • Salsa in my Cup
      • Decorating for Christmas
      • Santa Shawn
      • Lockdown
      • Shawn's Cancer Humor
      • Zombie Apocalypse
      • Strong
      • Stories for My Daughter
    • ► November (12)
      • One Year Later
      • Joy!
      • Watching “Widows”
      • Thanksgiving
      • More
      • Report Cards
      • Bill Brimley's Speech at CNAS in Honor of His Son, Shawn
      • Smash the Patriarchy
      • Field Trips, Open Houses and Other Events I Can't Attend Anymore
      • Shawn's Wife
      • What Would Shawn Do? (Election Day 2018)
      • Why I Might Have to Stop Reading "Mommy Blogs"
    • ► October (13)
      • Dad Is Not a Zombie
      • CNAS Tribute to Shawn (Part 2)
      • Guns and Cancer
      • Life advice from the aesthetician
      • It's Easy to Judge (100th Blog Post)
      • "Holistic Medicine" and Other Words I Never Used to Like
      • Austin and the Kittens
      • "Go To the Hospital"
      • Not My Domain
      • The Joshua Tree
      • Sorry For Your Loss: A Review
      • A Brutal Few Weeks
      • The Feminist in Our House
    • ► September (11)
      • My Garden
      • I Might As Well Get Cheaper Tires If My Husband Has to Be Dead
      • EMDR
      • Claire's Hero
      • Falling Trees
      • Reckless
      • Parent 2
      • We All Hurt
      • No Ma'am
      • The First Day of School, Part 2
      • Remembering Shawn as He Really Was
    • ► August (14)
      • Michele Flournoy's Eulogy of Shawn
      • Family photos
      • 20 Years
      • Talking to My Kids About Death, Again
      • Promises I Can’t Keep
      • The First Day of School
      • I Want to Die Right Now Because at Least Then I Wouldn’t Have to Carry Anyone Home After They Throw Up from Eating Too Much Ice Cream
      • Running With Anger
      • The Marine
      • A Beautiful Day
      • That Poor Girl
      • The Power of the Word "Widow"
      • Dear Girl on the Phone from UCLA
      • Weekend Shawn
    • ► July (13)
      • The Treadmill
      • Who's Saving Our Basement? (Part 2)
      • Reading with Claire
      • Why Being a Widowed Single Mom is So Hard
      • Single
      • Nana
      • The Scar
      • A Review of "A Widow's Guide to Healing"
      • Run Away
      • 6 Months
      • Go, Go, Go
      • An Anniversary of Sorts
      • What If the Plane Crashes?
    • ► June (13)
      • Shawn's Birthday, Part 2
      • Shawn's Birthday
      • 5 Stars
      • CNAS Tribute to Shawn
      • Brussels Sprouts
      • Father's Day
      • You're Not Bothering Me
      • It's Just Me
      • So Proud
      • Do You Know What Makes Me Nervous?
      • Grandpa Tom
      • 90s Party
      • An Uncomfortable Reality
    • ► May (12)
      • Full Time
      • Where Should We Begin?
      • Brave Through It
      • Peace Be With You
      • Pooping on the Potty
      • Why Do All the Damn Parents Die in Disney movies?
      • Mother's Day
      • Who Am I?
      • I Turned Out Okay
      • Our Forever House
      • I'm Not Sure How You Survive That
      • Riding Bikes
    • ► April (13)
      • My Flawed Husband
      • To Update the Account
      • I'm Not Grateful
      • Frozen
      • It Doesn't Matter
      • The Last Perfect Weekend
      • Keep Walking Past That Door
      • Press Fast-Forward
      • "You look hot, by the way"
      • My First Sleepover Birthday Party
      • It Can Always Get Worse
      • There's No Crying at the Swim-Up Bar
      • One King Bed
    • ► March (12)
      • Straight to Heaven
      • I Knew You Before
      • Why I Can't Call You Back
      • All Kinds of Therapy
      • First Day Back
      • It's Not "Better"
      • The Guitar Lesson Guy
      • Who's Saving Our Basement?
      • The Little Hand on My Back
      • There's Only One Option, and This Is It
      • My Eulogy of Shawn
      • “I’m at Trader Joe's, What Do You Need?”
    • ► February (3)
      • Costco and the Cemetery
      • Chuck E. Cheese and Jury Duty
      • My 39th Birthday...
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